Book Club Week

I get to be spoiled this week. I’m hosting book club at my house tonight with a group that’s magically and wonderfully come together. We’ll be discussing Where the Crawdads Sing by Delia Owens. Then, on Wednesday evening, my 6^th grader and I will join other families to discuss Forget-Me-Not by Ellie Terry in a school book club. 

I’ve been pro-book clubs for years now. Not only because I’ve garnered a tremendous amount of support from local book clubs, but also because of the powerful conversations—the connections—they have the potential to incite. The empathy. Seeing the world from someone else’s point of view. Taking us out of our own little worlds and broadening our scope. All good things.

I have to laugh sometimes when I come across mentions of book clubs in some of the novels I read. Often they’re touted as merely social gatherings. The latest thing. Think Bunco or wine tastings. I’ll always be one to argue book clubs—when there is actual discussion of books—possess an intrinsic ability to have us step outside ourselves, if only for a brief time. Book clubs remind us of our humanity, our vulnerability, our innate need for one another. They teach us to be gentle and kind to one another, while also challenging us to stand up for what we believe in.

Book clubs remind us of what’s important. And what’s not.

*Not in a book club and have no idea how to start one? Please, reach out. I’d love to help! I lived here for maybe three months before I got to work and joined not one, but two book clubs. All it takes is a love of reading and a little bit of risk-taking.

Stretching Selections

Have I told you how much I love book clubs before? I know. I know. I gush. But there’s a reason for it. More than one. Dozens, actually. My latest spark of elation is steeped in the diverse book choices members opt to read.

People, I’m being stretched. And I love it.

Someday I’ll tell you how my current book club got piecemealed together. We’ve started strong and I’m seriously excited to sit down with the women to discuss one member’s first selection: The Immortalists by Chloe Benjamin. In full disclosure, I’m not sure it’s a book I would have picked. I love the concept. A mystical woman shares the dates four young siblings will die. Told from all four perspectives, we encounter how each sibling wrestles with this heavy information as they age. I’ve entertained the idea of writing a novel with a similar premise before. Some of the perspectives take me out of my comfort zone. But something kept happening as I got deeper into the pages. I kept wanting to talk about it. I babbled to my mom about it. I broached the theme of the book with my husband, which launched an intriguing conversation.

This book is masterfully written and it is an excellent book club selection. Why? Because I’m dying to talk about it—to discuss the tension between nature vs. nurture, fate vs. free will. I’m eager to hear what the other members of my book club think about the characters, their decisions, and how their lives unfolded.

The Immortalists might not have been the first book I’d gravitate toward when it comes to choosing our next read, but I’m so glad it was someone else’s first go-to. Because it’s doing what all my favorite books do—it’s growing me. I think of life differently because of this read. And that is just one of the bounties of book club.

A Book Is Born—THE AFTER GLIMPSE

At book clubs I’m often asked where my ideas come from. The concept for THE AFTER GLIMPSE (available now) was first sparked in an ice cream shop in Wethersfield, Connecticut years ago. The owner takes pictures of her patrons and hangs the Polaroid photographs all over the shop, so even the ceiling is covered. I knew somewhere inside that shop existed a picture from when my mom had visited the ice cream shop with us years earlier. When my family went back to the same store years after my mom’s visit, I spent time hunting among the hundreds of pictures for the one the owner took of my mom and my girls. Suddenly, I was overcome with a stab of nostalgia, thinking how cool it’d be if I found the photograph, and my dad, who’d passed away years before my mom visited, somehow materialized in the picture next to my mom.

I found the picture. My dad wasn’t in it.

…and so a book was born.

In the process of writing this book, and now releasing it, I understand how this book is about grief, but it’s also about so much more.

Our lives—every relationship—every interaction counts for something and as one endorser so profoundly put it . . . “maybe there’s more going on around us than we know.”

The After Glimpse is available in paperback and ebook formats—TODAY.

*If you read & enjoy, please consider writing a review on Amazon and/or Goodreads.

Ice Wine

Because we have a disarray of boxes all over our house, and I have more to do than I could possibly cross off any list, I’m going to keep today’s post short & sweet.

It was my turn to select the food and drinks for book club last week. We read the psychological thriller, THE ICE TWINS by S.K. Tremayne.

I decided to have a little fun in the liquor store while choosing wines. I took my time wandering the aisles until I came across these five…

Do you believe we had some left over?

How

Look Closely

See the faces in this picture? These are a few of my book club peeps and hear me when I say these women help make my world go round. Also, I’d like to mention in these tumultuous times, that in our group of twelve, there are at least six faiths represented. Did we plan to establish a religiously diverse book club? No. It just worked out that way and I’m that much more enlightened because it did. I can’t tell you how happily my brain buzzes after an invigorating book discussion with these women. I find I’m often challenged, though not threatened in my own faith. Because I firmly believe only that which rests on a weak foundation is threatened by the differences of others.

I’ve wrestled for weeks about how vocal to be about what’s happening in our country and I keep coming back to my actions—people will pay attention to how I’m living more than what I’m saying. So read this. But I also invite you to observe how I act online and in person. Hold me accountable. (Don’t vent or spew…but if you see me doing wrong to another human being, excluding, or being hateful, you are welcome to come to me and confront me about it. I believe in being open to change. And I’m certainly humble enough to know I screw up on a daily basis.)

Back to my peeps though for a second. I love God. He’s been good to me and changed my life in countless ways. I want others to know that love. However, I’m also really curious to hear about how others are living their lives. I appreciate listening to what motivates and drives them, what rituals and traditions they may espouse to, learning about their unique faith. Here’s a real kicker…the women in my book club have various political leanings as well. Would we choose to shut someone out, to oust them, if they opposed our viewpoint? No. That’s not who we are. Instead, if I may say so, I think most of us feel that someone who doesn’t share our same views actually has the ability to edify us if we’re only willing to hear them.

That’s just it.

It starts with us. We need to be willing. We need to let others in. To cut the fear. To stay accountable. To remain open and nonjudgmental.

And we need to look closely at our own behavior before we try to convince anyone else of anything. 

8 Reasons Why Your Book Club is Falling Apart

I’ve had the life-changing experience of being a part of some amazing book clubs. We’ve met for

years, growing our book shelves and our outlook on the world and those we share it with. Incredible relationships have formed. Unforgettable conversations have taken place. That being said, I’ve met plenty of people who’ve wanted to know what makes it work. I’ve heard stories about book clubs that have imploded and crumbled until eventually they fizzled out entirely.

I’ve read hundreds of novels in my day. But that’s not all I read. I love books on leadership, creativity, group dynamics, growth, inspiration, etc. And I’ve read enough of these to know, as well as have taken on leadership roles in almost every stage of my life, that cohesiveness and group dynamics are sometimes a pliable experiment.

With the knowledge I’ve gained through the years, my own book club experiences, and my observations having visited over two dozen book clubs as an author, I’m offering some potential reasons why you’re book club might be slowly dying.

If you want to resuscitate the life of your group, the following are worth a read…

Show me the Money

Somewhere along the way the focus of your group slipped off track. The ohs and ahs were in response to the elaborate food and wine selection, the upscale restaurant choice, even the over-your-head book you selected because you wanted to come across smart. A book club can derail when it becomes a show—all about the money and not about the content inside the book and the people in the group. I was asked to discuss THE FLOWER GIRLS with a thriving group in town. They meet up at a restaurant every month. This works for them. But it might not for your group. Find what works. Word hard to keep the focus where it belongs. The way I see it, a successful group shouldn’t care if you show up in Banana Republic attire or a pajama top your toddler smeared with bananas.

War and Peace Out

I love Wally Lamb. He’s been a huge inspiration for my work for years. However, I’d think twice before I’d choose I KNOW THIS MUCH IS TRUE for my book club. I’m confident it would lead to a great discussion, but I’m also mindful how busy the women in my group are. It just wouldn’t fly. Women and yes, men, the length of a book matters. There are some fantastic lengthier reads out there. Ask your group how much they can handle. I know in my case there are women who show up each month that simply couldn’t get the book read. I think they’d see a 900-page book and say fuget about it before they opened the first page.

Opinion Opal

Anyone who has ever been in a group knows exactly who Opinion Opal is. She’s not a group killer per se, but she sure can put a bruise in a book club. When one person dominates most of the discussion it can sour the overall group experience and dissuade the more timid souls in the group from speaking up, especially if Opal is a bully-type. There are ways to help this situation. Select different leaders each month. Have the person who chose the book lead the discussion. Or, do it my favorite way and get with O.O. one-on-one. Understand where she’s coming from. It’s amazing how, once someone feels understood, they become more open to change.

Get me out Gabby

By the time book club wraps up not only do you know every single thing Gabby felt about all nine of the characters in the book, you also know what shoe size her four kids are, what kind of coffee her husband drinks, and her bra size. We can all have our Gabby nights, but if you find you’ve got a repeat Gabby in your group it can make members think twice about showing up to the next club. Book club questions are a real life saver when it comes to Gabby.

What Book?

Okay, I get it. There’s nothing like having an excuse to get your friends together, drink wine, eat expensive cheese, and laugh until it hurts. But one thing I don’t get is book clubs that never read or discuss the book. I’ve visited enough book clubs to appreciate when the book launches into other stimulating discussions. That’s not what I’m referring to here. I’m talking about when members show up having no clue which book was to be read this month. If there’s an inconsistent understanding of whether or not members actually want to discuss the book that can rattle the core of a group that calls themselves a book club. If that’s your group, I give you permission. Right here and now. Call yourself wine lovers. Do it and be proud. But if you’re never reading or enjoying any kind of book discussion, don’t slap a label on something that can’t own it.

“Tuesday’s Gray and Wednesday Too….It’s Friday...”

Nothing like an inconsistent meeting time to throw a group into a complete tizzy. If members can’t circle a date on a calendar (listen to me, I’m such a ’90s chick with my calendar circling) or type a time in their iPhone, it’s not happening. We’re all too busy. Irregular or inconsistent meeting times could be what’s causing the dropouts.

Cookie Cutter Selections

If the last five books your group has read are about an Alzheimer’s patient I can guarantee one of two things is going to happen. Either you’re all going to get hyper-paranoid you’re in the early stages of dementia, or members are going to begin booking other events the night of the club, dissing the meeting. Variety is key. I’m not saying you have to hop from self-help to biography to memoir to psychological suspense. I’m only saying you should read my books. They’re unique and give you plenty to discuss (shameless plug). Seriously, variety helps. A wonderful plan for this is throwing several options for each month in a hat and letting the group decide the final vote.

Size Matters

Oh yeah, I said it. Before, I mean. And now again. Because the size of your group matters. It really does. I’ve read countless times, in leadership books, how six to eight people is the ideal group size for a discussion. This isn’t to say that if you have twelve you should immediately kick four members out. Because most of us realize there will always be no-shows. It also doesn’t mean your quaint group of four needs to recruit like the Girl Scouts on crack. (Scary image, I apologize). It’s simply good to know. And if you’re group is hurting, it could have to do more with size than you realize.

So, there you have it. Perhaps I didn’t list one of the reasons why you sense your group is struggling. I’d love to revisit this topic. Clearly, it’s something I feel passionate about. It’s because of the profound impact my book clubs have had in my life. I want that for you.

Feel free to reach out and let me know how it’s going.

Pub Day for Ellory James

The Short & Sincere Life of Ellory James is now for sale at Amazon. Paperback or ebook. Great choice for book clubs, Christmas gifts, treat-yourself-days, etc.!

Purchase your copy today!

If you fall in love with Ellory & Pete the way that I did, share your thoughts by writing a review on Amazon &/or Goodreads.

What are you waiting for? Ellory is waiting for you to meet her!

Unveiling My New Cover

Guess you could call me a fertile novelist. I’m so excited to reveal the cover of a new book I have coming out in February called, THE DELICATE NATURE OF LOVE.

Another nod to Sarah Thompson who did a magnificent job creating this cover.

Continue to visit here and my Facebook page for more details (especially some major promotions I’m having fun planning)…

 

So, what do you think of my new cover?

 

*Will be back in December

A Launch Party to Remember

Last night I felt like I was living a scene right out of It’s a Wonderful Life. Friends, acquaintances, and regular book club attendees gathered at a local coffee shop to discuss my book, ask me questions, and have their books signed. Neighbors, women from my book clubs, fellow writers, librarians, church members, folks from the local elementary school, and good friends, old and new, showed up.

Not only did I sell all of my copies of The Disappearing Key, I felt an overwhelming amount of support.

Toward the end of the evening, I answered questions and received invaluable feedback that reminded me why I was excited to get my work out there.

Oh what a night, indeed! One I know I’ll not soon forget.

Thanks to all who made the effort to be there! And for those who couldn’t make it, you were missed.

*In case you missed them, I wrote guest posts for Julie Jarnagin (From Puddle Play to Stain Removal: Novel Writing from Mud to Clean) & Lindsay Harrel (The Heart of a Lonely Writer) yesterday.

Creative Ideas for Hosting a Disappearing Key Book Club

One of the most common reactions I’ve received from people who’ve read The Disappearing Key is that they are eager to talk about it. I seriously wish I could sit in on every single book club scheduled to discuss my book.

Did you know, over the course of the next year I’ve challenged myself with a goal to have at least one book club from every state read my novella?

Today, I’d thought it’d be fun to present you with some ideas if you’re the one hosting The Disappearing Key discussion.

(Inspired by details found in the novella.)

Food

Serve key lime pie

Prosseco toast to good friends and great discussions

Locate an Italian bakery & purchase, then serve cannolis (Gabrielle’s favorite)

Buy Trader Joe’s Spanakopita, heat, and serve

Cook the classic English dish of fish & chips

Bake key cookies. Feel free to take a bite out of one. Hey, they’re supposed to be disappearing, aren’t they? ;-)

Here are two ideas from Pinterest:

http://www.pinterest.com/pin/204280533070487717/ & http://sweetcupcakesandtreats.blogspot.com/2011/03/keys-to-my-heart.html

Decorations & Ambiance

Have Edelweiss or potted Sweet Williams “Wee Willies” as Viola calls them on the table

Set colorful place settings in honor of Oriana’s synesthesia

Use key decorated place markers or wine charms

Place a Bavarian “looking” music box as coffee table centerpiece

Program Michel Bublé or Jack Johnson on Pandora

Giveaways

Offer “key”psakes

Hand out bookmarks with a key stamped on them

Give any of the aforementioned cookies away

Buy & pass out extra copies of The Disappearing Key for members to use as stocking stuffers for family or friends (or hostess gifts)

Points of Interest

Talk about the movie Return to Zero 

If you’re hosting a mom’s group, encourage guests to bring ultrasound photos & create a game where everyone tries to match mom to baby picture

Cut out scrap pictures of what you imagine the characters to look like. Discuss similarities and differences

Talk about what it might feel like to have synesthesia.

Go through Book Club Questions located in the back of the print version of The Disappearing Key and the end of the ebook version of TDK.

Feel free to contact the author. I have a gut feeling she’d love to be in on your book club action.

**

Now for a chance to win a set of “key” imprinted cards, you tell me a creative book club idea related to keys or details of The Disappearing Key plot that would enhance a book club experience. Most creative answer gets the key cards! I’ll announce winner next Tuesday.

Update on the Key Book Clubs from Coast to Coast Contest

New England: 7

Florida: 2

Pennsylvania: 1

Iowa: 1

*If you know of a book club that is planning to read The Disappearing Key, please ask them to notify me so I can include them in my Key Book Club from Coast to Coast Contest. Thanks!

8 Explanations for Your Broken Book Club (+ Solutions)

Everything has a tendency to break at one point or another. I’m swooping in as the book club “Wolf” toda

y to clean up any messes. Is your book club threatening to crack in two?

No fear, the Book Club Wolf is here.

Here are eight reasons your book club might be faltering and some solutions to help…

The Books

I have no idea how your book club makes its selections but after partaking in several book clubs for years, I’ve come to understand the value of assessing a book’s conversation quotient. What’s a conversation quotient? The degree to which a book incites quality, enriching, and meaningful dialogue. Some books are fantastic but just don’t lend themselves to this type of discussion.

Solution:  Visit sites like Goodreads and bookmovement to read what people are saying about books. Ask friends what their book clubs have enjoyed. It’s worth these small acts to figure out if your group is reading books with optimal conversation quotient potential.

Books that have stirred engrossing conversations in book clubs that I’ve attended…

Gone Girl, Still Alice, Mudbound, Defending Jacob…to name a few.

Lack of Lead

This role need not be assigned to one person, but book clubs begin to weaken when no one wants to step up and begin asking probing, thought-provoking questions.

Solution:  Many authors have book club discussion questions listed on their websites or often if you Google discussion questions or the book title a dozen options will pop up for your club to explore.

Dynamic

This one is the hardest to pinpoint. But it happens. Eager Emma doesn’t mix well with Shy Cheryl. Hyper-opinionated Halle causes friction every time she sits next to super open-minded Opal. Hundreds of these group dynamics could be misfiring.

Solution: Invite new members. Discern commitment level. Break off into two separate groups within the same meeting (or not).

Lack of Commitment

Only two or three members show up.

Solution:  Change the meeting to daytime hours, or evening if you previously met in the day. Coordinate best times that would work. Write up a mini-questionnaire to get opinions on what would help strengthen the book club. Everyone likes to feel heard.

Hungry and Thirsty Members

Bowl of stale popcorn and water won’t entice many members.

Solution: I’m not suggesting you break the bank, but there are many ways to creatively tie in the theme when you provide a few light snacks (brownies are an inexpensive classic) and maybe a drink or two. I make a blueberry sangria whenever I host (because it’s yummy + cost effective).

Feed the troops. They’ll thank you for it and it will improve the overall experience.

Too Serious

Getting right down to business the second everyone walks in the door is sure to breed irritation. Book clubs are meant for discussing books. But let’s not fool ourselves, they’re also about socializing, and carving out time for our minds to relax + recharge.

Solution: Incorporate ways to lighten up the meetings. Gag gifts (possibly related to the book), icebreakers, discuss ideas of what each of you envision a book club to be, play background music and shut it off to help create a divide between socializing cocktail hour and time devoted to the book.

Not Serious Enough

It can get frustrating if you’re hoping to get into a hearty discussion about a book and the entire time is devoted to jabbing about Laura Lynn’s new dining room set.

Solution: Here’s another example where a print-out of discussion questions can help. And the music (see above). Assign everyone a month when they are to “lead” to help guide conversation. Allot an half hour, hour, or however long you all agree to visit before then transitioning into another room (this always works with my clubs…it’s a given when we move from the kitchen into the living room it’s time to go to the book).

Dominant Party

Mayday, mayday, we’ve got a book club takeover on our hands. She shows up extra early, brings sugar free snacks, then spends the entire evening interrupting everyone  and preaching her opinions to the group. She might as well be saying, “Off with their heads.”

Solution: Group dynamics 101. Do you kick her to the curb? Of course not. But, the Wolf says it’s essential to regroup your group. Begin a meeting addressing the interruption issue (without pointing fingers). Vary who hosts or leads the group and have other members demonstrate clarity over who is in the lead each week. And of course, there’s always direct confrontation which, when done well, I feel is always best.

So there you have it. Your bloody book club is all tidied up. Thanks to the this here Book Club Wolf. ;-)

Have you ever witnessed the fall of a group? Ever put thought into how to make it better? Did it get better? Worse? Why?

*photo by morguefile