There are times in life when we all have to make difficult
decisions. They can feel like someone cracking open our chest with a crowbar or
these moments can feel more subtle, like scratching off a scab.
No matter how it
feels, I happen to believe it matters how we take on times of decision.
Here are a few things that I’ve gleaned from going through challenging
times of resolution. . .
Confront the Situation
Honestly
No use pretending conflict away. It’s not going anywhere. In
fact, hear that? It’s your conscience knocking, telling you it’s time. I know
it’s tempting to blow something off when you don’t want to deal with it. Or to
sugarcoat and twist it to be something more innocuous than it really is. Take
off the rose-colored glasses and face it for the ugly green monster it is.
Recognize Patterns
Pattern behavior can serve as a wonderful guide when you’re
wondering whether or not you think someone will change. Can people change? I
absolutely believe they can, but I also believe if they’re demonstrating
similar behavior repeatedly, it’s time to pay attention. Which leads me to. . .
Be Realistic about
Expectations
It’s helpful to take a good hard look at your role in the
situation. Are you the one who needs to make some adjustments? Have you done
anything to make the decision more challenging than it has to be? Let your
emotions take over? Lacked empathy? Demonstrated apathy? It’s important to have
realistic expectations of how things will play out after your decision is imparted.
Consult Trusted
Mentors & Friends
It’s wise to receive valuable insight from people who’ve
made smart choices in the past. Reach out. You might be surprised by what you
learn. It also provides comfort and accountability, so you can be reminded that you’re not alone.
Take Care of Yourself
in the Process
Stress can wreak havoc on the body. Think Space Invaders on
your healthy cells. Be mindful of this. Get plenty of rest. Take walks.
Breathe. I still appreciate the scene in My
Best Friend’s Wedding when Julia Roberts is on the floor of the hotel,
crushed, and the concierge bends down and tells her, “This too shall pass.”
It’s a great thing to say to yourself during times like these.
Maintain Integrity
Because emotions are generally inflamed when you endure trials,
it would be easy to whip up some pies like those found in the pages of The Help. Yep, you know what I’m
referring to. But don’t. Don’t go pooping in your pies. Keep focused. Remember
who you want to be in times like this. Cling to character and class no matter how
hurt you feel. It’ll speak volumes.
Hope in the Future
Life’s pretty cool in that it keeps on going. You don’t
enter a comatose state once you’ve followed through with your decision. You go
on. Life goes on. So Obladi. Oblada . . . make it count.
Ever have to make a
hard decision? What helped you in the process?
