Showing posts with label circles. Show all posts
Showing posts with label circles. Show all posts

Monday, February 19, 2018

Greatest Belonging


Finally, I got to go see The Greatest Showman yesterday in the theater and man, oh, man, I loved it! It reached me on so many levels. Throughout the movie I kept thinking how central to the human character it is for all of us to find some sense of belonging. I teared up during one scene when P.T. Barnum’s wife, Charity, says to him something like, “You don’t need everyone to love you, just a few good people.”

A few good people.

I know what it’s like to be seduced by lights, to desperately crave approval from others. I’m well-acquainted with circles, sitting blissful, and at times, ignorantly excluding in the center of them. I’m also achingly aware of what it feels like to be carelessly tossed out of circles. Whether on my own volition, or because someone decided I no longer had a place, it’s devastating to lose that sense of belonging.

I’ve navigated beyond these losses, daring to create new bonds. Being familiar with the intimate pain of what it feels like to have belonging stripped away, I seek ways to help others to feel included. Wanted. Cared for.

That’s what was so mesmerizing and beautiful about this film. We all struggle with a freakish nature. We are all afraid to be shockingly vulnerable, scared that our secrets, our shortcomings, our oddities, and our “otherness” will be found out. Know what we all really desire?

To be embraced and loved for who we are, where we are, as we are.

There’s also beauty in learning to discern who the few good people are—the small ring of folks in our lives who will always be faithful, who love us through and through.




Monday, April 27, 2015

How Stepping Out of Circles Has Influenced My Creativity

Through the years I’ve encountered several experiences when I’ve moved away from a circle I was in. Sometimes this was by choice. Sometimes it wasn’t. No matter the reason why I left the circle, I can look back and respect how the sudden change altered my creative life.

Leaving circles has influenced me to…

Say Goodbye to My Comfort Zone

When you’re inside a circle you feel a strange sense of protection. Maybe it’s the invisible boundary. Maybe it’s how all is contained within. So it can be terrifying to step out—to not know what the world holds for you beyond the boundary. But it can also be eye-opening. After all, there is a whole world out there.

Shed People’s Opinions of Me

I haven’t mastered this yet, but with every circle I’ve been nudged out of I’ve gained a better sense of who I am and who I want to be. I’ve learned the value of not placing my sense of worth in what others think of me. It’s unbelievable what this can do for creativity. Without the fear of judgment, the mind has few limits.

Inspired Me to Become More Resourceful

This is especially the case when I’ve been sent packing. I remember some sad seasons when I felt like I lost my closest friends in life, only to realize I knew some really cool people I hadn’t paid attention to because I was so busy keeping my eyes fixed within the circle.

Break up My Routine

There’s something about circle living that invites monotony. Do the same old thing in the same old way. Seek approval for that thing. Stay within the confines. Parting circles taught me the beauty of doing things differently. Of trying new things. Of stretching myself.

Increase My Empathy

It’s never fun to be shoved out of a circle. But it can teach so much. In the aftermath of circle living, I had a choice. I could wallow in the pain or I could allow the pain to inform me about the kind of person I wanted to be and the way I wanted to treat others. This is creativity at its best. Receiving pain in life and being able to knead it, turning it into something else.

Brought My Goals into Focus

Change inspires focus. It’s interesting stepping away from a circle could actually conjure a better sense of attention, but as soon as I was stripped of things I’d relied on, that’s exactly what happened. I was left asking the question, “What now?”

In full disclosure, after leaving some circles I’ve had to adjust to a drawback as well.

Loss of Support & Connection (whether real or perceived)

It’s taken me a long time to accept how there are seasons for everything. Can’t it always be spring? But even in the heartache that’s come with circle evictions, I’ve grown. I’ve garnered a strong sense of what fuels me and my creativity. I’ve grown more discerning. And, hard as it is for a sensitive soul, I’ve learned to move on.

When’s the last time you left a circle? Looking back, can you see how it influenced your creativity?

Taking Time

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