Monday, September 14, 2009

Broken Places


I did not expect to write this. But I decided to because I’m guessing you’ve been here too. God is binding up the broken places in me. He’s mending so close to my heart I’m having difficulty writing about it. Deep wounds, gashed and still vulnerable, apparently. God, the wonderful Counselor is hard at work fully healing me, not performing a botched job where half my heart remains hanging out. He doesn’t want these pains to be scabbed over or His stitches to show forever. He is a God of healing, so I look at that same area of hurt and see nothing, no scar or jagged reminder that I once was hurt there.

I’ve been busy lately (likely excuse for not getting into “God surgery” before) but I’m cognizant that God is always working. His spiritual counseling has the potential to look and sometimes feel a little bit like surgery, tweezing out where sharp splinters of bitterness have impaled and pumping life-giving blood back into what’s been trampled by loss or betrayal. Unlike me, God takes His time. He wants it done right. Nothing is worse to God than a slipshod job of healing.

God and I bantered a little before I wrote this post and here’s how that talk went:

Me: “I don’t want to write that. I like funny. I’m comfortable with funny. Or questions. I love asking questions. How ‘bout that?”

God: (I don’t hear God’s voice audibly, but I know the impression of His Spirit and His voice) “It’s not time to be funny. You’re not there to be comfortable. And about the questions...we’ll get to that later.”

Me: “Okay, but it’s a risk.”

God: “Exactly.”

Me: “That’s part of the healing, isn’t it?”

God: “It’s part of your healing.”

My life is richly blessed. I’m still grateful for my role as wife and mother. I’m still developing strong friendships, still laughing with family members, and I’m still reading and writing during chunks of my day. But I’m also doing something else, invisible, yet more powerful than I’ll ever understand. I’m healing.


“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. He determines the number of stars and calls them each by name. Great is our Lord and mighty in power; his understanding has no limit.” Psalm 147:3-5

“Then your light will break forth from the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say; Here am I. “If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk, and if you spend yourselves on behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will becomes like the noonday. The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail. Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins and will raise up the age-old foundations; you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls, Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.” Isaiah 58: 8-12





*photos by flickr
**I'm over at Live Beautiful later today

33 comments:

  1. I love this post. God's healing is amazing and sometimes even when we are trying to ignore His voice, He keeps pushing us until we realize that He is standing right next to us through everything.

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  2. Wendy, both of these passages are deeply precious to me. Thank you for sharing them today. They really encouraged me!

    I'm so glad that you wrote this post. And so happy about what he is doing in your life, no matter how painful it is. Thank you for being willing to be vulnerable. His healing is the best. He will be with you ever step of the way and it will be done with complete, perfect love.

    Have a great day! I'm praying for you!

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  3. God is so awesome! He is the Comforter, Healer, Savior, Deliverer. I've found the process of healing hurts, but the peace afterwards is total. :O)

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  4. Even though the process of healing is hard, you will grow even closer to the Lord in the end. And yes, you do have so many blessings in your life.
    God is so good.
    Will be praying for you!

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  5. That was such a blessing to read! Going thorough a process of healing myself, so thank you. And the scripture could have been more encouraging!

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  6. Thank you for sharing this piece of yourself with me (and all your other readers), Wendy! Your transparence through your healing is incredibly refreshing. So many times I read other's blogs and wonder...is it just me? That Isaiah verse is awesome. I love the part that says, "your light will rise in the darkness, your night will become like the noonday". Thank you for blessing me this morning!

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  7. The process of healing is often painful, as you have experienced. I have been there many times. But know that He holds you in the palm of His hand. He won't give you anything you can't handle. I am thankful for a God who refuses to leave us in barren places.

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  8. this is beautiful - thank you for sharing! I, too, am in the process of being healed by God. It is often painful -- but He is always perfectly loving.

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  9. It's a beautiful post, Wendy, and you were wonderful to share it with us. He is speaking to us through you, at the same time He continues with your healing. Thank you.

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  10. Your willingness to follow His lead is beautiful, Wendy. I too know the desire to stay funny...to stay at arm's length, hidden in the safe folds of humors embrace...and He too has called me out of the comfort zone to the battle front of real emotion...raw and painful. Just yesterday, He prompted a blog from me that I am still shaking over...but I know that He never calls us out in vain and I sit back in His lap knowing that He will use what He plans for beautiful purposes.
    I am praying for you and I pray that as you step out in faith to answer His call, that His arms would hold your heart :)
    Huggles, Beautiful Lady...
    Bina

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  11. Awesome post! Those verses give me goosebumps. He is our healer...what a wonderful reminder. Thank you!

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  12. Oh, Wendy. I have tears as I type this, dear sister.
    It isn't easy to let God heal you, nor to share during the healing process. But it's harder still to remain broken.
    Thank you for your candor. I admire you more and more each time I come to your blog.
    I agree with you for complete healing.
    Love,
    Jen

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  13. Wow your post really got me thinking about the purpose of my writing. I'd like to think it was more than an exercise in my healing but if it heals me along the way I think that's great. I really want to use my writing as a ministry. But I do know God knows best and His plans in turn are the best for me.

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  14. Beautiful post, Wendy. You're so right, healing is a risk. And it's almost as painful as what caused you to be broken in the first place. Thank you so much for sharing with us today. I will keep praying for you and praising God that He's so faithful and loves us dearly.

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  15. Don't know if my comment went through - computer freaked out.

    I thanked you for sharing this and told you I was glad you were using your faith to hela your broken parts... if there is a duplicate delete it! I hate it when this happens :)

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  16. In awe of a God who
    Binds up the Broken-hearted...
    Who lets us trade in our ashes
    for Beauty.

    - Jennifer

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  17. Beautifully written, Wendy! I'm praying for you!

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  18. Thanks for sharing such a heartfelt post. Throughout the healing process in my life I can testify to the power and blessings of the Great Physician whether it is physical, spiritual, emotional or relationship. Yes, there are many scars from abuse, overwhelming grief and loss and chronic illness, but each day I can feel His hand smoothing those scars out and making the rememberance of the pain disappear.

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  19. Whatever you need to be healed, God will provide it. I'm going through a spiritual growth period myself. Things haven't been going the way I want, but God's helping me surrender to him and trust in his plan for me. Sending prayers your way.

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  20. Beautifully put, Wendy. I'll be praying that God will sustain you and bring you a deeper sense of his peace through this healing process.

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  21. Hi Wendy...

    Great to meet you through your comment over at (in)Courage. Thanks for reviewing my book... and for sharing your tears. Now I have to ask which book is it?

    Sweet Blessings,
    Lysa

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  22. Wendy, Thank you for baring your heart with others.

    Blessings

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  23. Isiah 61 ... beauty for ashes. Heal and shine.

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  24. First I'd like to start by thanking everyone for the overwhelming encouragement and kindness. Your words carried me through the day. Thank you. I am deeply grateful.

    Get Real Girl, I agree, ignoring is a futile business.

    Kristen, I'm stunned how God finds ways to bless and encourage us as we exchange ways to be real and blunt before Him.

    Diane, peace = total. I like!

    Jennifer, thank you for the prayers and I'm not afraid of hard things. I just sometimes try to avoid them.

    Laura Jean, I did a Beth Moore Bible study years ago that explored that second Scripture word by word. It was a beautiful exploration of His Word.

    Beth, I just get tired of hiding sometimes and it feels right to be honest here of all places, the place where I'm hoping to document growth/movement.

    Barbie, refusing to leave us in barren places. Saying an Amen to that right now.

    Lauren, I will pray your healing continues in His perfect love.

    Janna, what a reward that would be. What a rich reward.

    Bina, time and time again, you've been kind to me on here. Thank you for that.

    Jessica, I love when His living and active Word physically impacts us!

    Jen, and I hold great admiration for YOU.

    T.Anne, I just finished a book last night that stirred something in me, dug up some stuff. Reading, not writing. It's amazing what God will use to clean out the gunk.

    Cindy, you are a blessing in my life. Congratulations! :D

    Kathy B, that you came back and wrote it again means a lot to me! Faith is a powerful thing.

    Jennifer, He astounds me. Who, but a loving God would do that?

    Thanks, Heather. Did I miss your post today?

    Oh, Donna, chronic illness is so difficult. I know more by witnessing what one of my sister's endures. I will pray for you. I admire your attitude.

    Jill, I'm cyber high-fiving you.

    Jody, a fitting prayer indeed and I thank you for it.

    Lysa, your book is rich with insight and HONESTY (a true love of mine).

    Karen, I think that has been my blessing and curse.

    Sande, ahhh, to shine. To shine!

    I'm without words (shocking!). You each have reached me and encouraged me in ways you may only learn about in heaven.

    I continue to heal and believe me, in this, I shall write on!

    ~ Wendy

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  25. This is beautiful, Wendy. I'm glad God is healing you. And I'm glad you chose to share this piece of yourself with us. :)

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  26. Thank you so much for sharing yourself with me and your readers. I am sure that by sharing your healing you are helping many of those around you heal as well. You completely ROCK!!

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  27. Wendy, what a beautiful, honest post. I find God does His greatest work in my life during the toughest times. I'm grateful for the healing He's working in yours, even though it's a tough process. May you experience the blessings of being putty in His strong, capable hands.

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  28. Wendy, thanks for that post. I really needed to hear that today - especially the passage from Isaiah. Good for a Monday when I'm already feeling pushed to my limits for the week!

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  29. Wendy, it's been a long day, yet I can't leave until I commend you for sharing. It is hard to be transparent. Hard also to have the Lord open old wounds to clean them out.

    But can you feel the clean?

    I love you!

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  30. Katie, so good to see you made it and thank you for your words.

    Doodles, I'm thinking that might have been what God meant by "your healing".

    Keli, It is good to be malleable.

    Sandi K., I love when His Word finds that place in us that really needed to hear it.

    Anne L.B., I can feel the clean! :D
    And, I love you too! Thank you for that.

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  31. Wendy,
    I'm glad you shared this part of you today.It makes you more real to us and let's us know it's okay to share who we are more often.Praying for you!

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  32. Oh, Beautiful Wendy!!! I love you funny, inquisitive AND broken and real. :-) God created you oh-so-wonderfully! Thanks for challenging us and for being vulnerable with us. I know how scary it can be.

    I'm so thankful that God is blessing you through the words and real life experiences He has put on my heart to share. Isn't He amazing?!?

    Know that you are loved and being lifted up in prayer.

    Sweetest blessings,
    Amy

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  33. Who better than God to heal and to handle your heart? People forget it's fragile.

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