You’ve heard of Stephen King’s, On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft? Today I’m going to give you a glimpse of On Mothering: A Memoir of the (it took everything inside me not to write the rhyming word with one less letter).
Really though, my pastor’s wife always says, “the proof will be in the pudding” when I commend how she’s raising her children. I’m newer on this road of parenting. My children are young. I cannot claim to spout off untold wisdom about life as mother. I can only tell you where I’ve been and what I’ve learned so far.
Before I do that I want to put something out there in cyberspace. I sometimes avoid detailing things on my blog that are closest to my heart. I’m careful when I write about my children and will continue to be. Also, I don’t see parenting as a job. Is it work? YES. Is it harder then I ever dreamed it would be? YES. Yesterday I wrote a blog about most engaging and most repulsive jobs and you’ll notice I neglected to mention my role as a mom in both (though at times I question if it could fall into both) categories. Why did I omit this role, this job that I hold so close to my heart? I did so because parenting feels more like a mission or a great assignment (as does writing, actually) than a job. But mothering is a mission I will always give the higher value to.
It’s sort of like what Paul wrote in Philippians. Without revealing details, I can tell you that in regards to motherhood, “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.” Knowing this makes me appreciate my great assignment as mother all the more.
Now, onto the advice part…
Allow yourself to fail (Did I just write that? Yep, I did. Stop having an internal dialogue on the page).
I mean, you can allow yourself to fail while not allowing yourself to be a failure as a parent. There’s a difference and it’s a big one.
We’ll make mistakes as parents. It’s inevitable. Did you know that a child can learn so many things from how we handle our own mistakes? If we yell too loudly, act crabby to a stranger, unfairly accuse our child of something, we can accept the fact we made a mistake…AND THEN…we can: Say Sorry. Apologizing can be such a teaching lesson for our children to witness. I’m convinced children need a human authority more than they need a robot one. When we do this, we still maintain our authoritative role; accepting responsibility, showing humility and modeling being forgiven all in one lesson.
Besides, being able to say sorry shows your child that you’re willing to grow too, that you care about impressions they’re receiving and finally, that you follow God’s lead first in your life.
Good Parenting to You!