Monday, April 4, 2011

Spouses of Writers Support

SOWS. Beautiful name, huh?

I met with a local author recently (something I’ve been in the habit of doing lately, meeting with writers in person as well as connecting online) and we agreed there really needs to be a support group for the spouses of writers. Now, I’m mostly kidding on this, but read the following mock meeting and tell me you don’t recognize a hint of yourself in there.

Jane: So, my husband’s been at it again.

Byron: At what?

Jane: He’s gone into the cave.

Emily: Oh, that’s nothing. At least he doesn’t talk to you at length about burgeoning (his word) characters. Or worse, every single new manuscript request. You should see the way he checks the computer for new emails 24/7. And the highs and lows. Writers truly are neurotic. He’s edited his novel more than once. What’s the deal, it’s like he’s obsessed with that manuscript.

Byron: You mean MS. I’ve learned to talk in acronyms. My wife’s done with her third MS and is on her fourth WIP. All HEAs, but IMHO they really aren’t all that happy. And now because she recently joined Twitter I’m called her DH.

Jane sips coffee, then: And what’s up with my husband struggling with his idea so much? He loved it at first, plotted the whole thing out. Plotting alone took him months. You should have seen the trail of notes all over our house. I thought they were love notes until I read the tidbits of research and descriptive phrases all over them. If you love an idea like that, what could possibly go wrong while you’re writing the middle?

Byron: I don’t know. I don’t get it though. They invest so much of themselves in their work, don’t they? It killed me to see my wife crying after her first rejection last week. Crying!

Emily: Oh, be a little more sensitive. She must love what she writes.

Byron: There’s love. And then there’s love. Ever seen that commercial with the lady kissing her dog? I’m just saying my wife was convinced she was horrible and that no one would buy her work. But she’s won awards. She’s wonderful. It’s like writers are required to sign up for a how to beat yourself up class before they pen their first word. Sensitivity on steroids.

Jane laughs and slaps her knee.

Emily: I’m just trying to figure out where these characters come from. I wonder if he writes about our fights.

Byron: I know my wife doesn’t. She has enough imaginary people bouncing around up there. (Points to head) She’d never use anything from real life. It’s like she’s not paying attention half the time. Either that or she’s taking mental notes for her next chapter.

Jane: And what’s up with all author photographs posed with such seriousness? I write therefore I can’t smile.

Emily: How about how funny they can be about others reading their work. Or the way they over-caffeinate themselves. Do they think it will inspire more great ideas?

Byron: Or working in their pajamas and skipping showers? Or the social networking craze to build that platform.

Jane: Or the horrendous waits they endure to be published. Masochists. (Shakes her head)

Emily: We may not get them, but we love their neurotic souls.

Jane & Byron in unison: Yeah, we love our crazies.

Okay, now for the fun question…whose spouse could you relate to in that entirely pretend, imaginary, made up, off the top of my head, fabricated (redundant much?) example? :D

*photo by flickr


  1. Byron could probably be my husband. I don't pay attention half the time. Bless his heart, I try. :)

  2. Sadly, all of them.

    Now I really feel like my hubby needs some extra special attention. On second thought, he had a year of that, he's going to have to deal with me and my writing for at least a few more months before I give him a few days break.

  3. LOL! Loved it Wendy! I think my husband could relate to Emily's comment about others reading their work. My husband comes near my computer screen, and I get all "funny." :)

  4. Ha. Love it!! I don't think I'd want to be the spouse of a writer. Unless of course I was one too - wait a minute, that makes no sense!! Okay, my spouse is not a writer, and I feel sorry for him! I wonder if where both spouses are writers, would that be fun or just a really weird house to visit?

  5. Emily or Byron. And I'm not married! LOL! But that is probably what my would say about me.


    What we give up for our writing and they love us anyway! Thanks Wendy. :)

  6. When I read this:

    ...She has enough imaginary people bouncing around up there. (Points to head) She’d never use anything from real life. It’s like she’s not paying attention half the time. Either that or she’s taking mental notes for her next chapter.

    I realized that you'd changed my husband's name to Byron for the purposes of this blog post. :D

    He's such a good husband.

  7. That. was. awesome.

    Emily would be my husband.

    Now that's just weird.

  8. Yeah, I gotta go with Byron. My poor hubby complains sometimes about me not being quite "there" all the time. lol... Great post, Wendy. I'm going to go love on my husband some. :)

  9. My DH doesn't really fit any of those. He's more of the "oh yeah" (as in aferthought) "my wife likes to write" (as in - I forgot all about that part of her life) :) :) He's amazingly supportive of the time I poor into it, but for the most part, fiction doesn't exist in his world ;)

  10. Oh my gosh, that was hilarious. Especially the part about the serious poses. :-)
    My hubby is fairly supportive unless stuff doesn't get done around the house. Then I get the evil eye. So he could be a little bit of all of them. LOL

  11. So funny! My hubby would definitely be Byron, poor man! It's not easy living with me!

  12. Ha! Love it.

    I think this would open my hubby's eyes a bit, so that he knew I'm not one of a kind with this stuff. ;)

  13. Love the SOWS! My hubbie is the one who loves my neurotic soul!

  14. Hi Wendy -

    Byron sounds like my late husband. He thought every word I wrote was edged in gold.

    What a great name for a support group!

    Susan :)

  15. Ha! I can relate to all of the above. My poor sweet husband. *sigh*

  16. So funny! Love the idea of the support group. I think my husband could probably relate to most of these spouses, especially Emily's comment about the highs and lows of us writers.

  17. My DH is Byron. One day he will become more like Emily. I hope:)

  18. None of the above. I must not be writing enough!!!

  19. Love talking in acronyms, I mean, really, doesn't everyone? LOL! I don't have a spouse, but I could see myself in many of the above comments.

  20. My hubby also writes so he is very supportive. We write together and solo.

  21. Wendy:
    Byron. But I want to know how Byron spends his day.

  22. This comment has been removed by the author.

  23. Great post, Wendy. Really made me smile and think about what my poor wife must go through. I linked to your post from my blog. Hope you don't mind.


Taking Time

college applications                 homecoming                            flag football                basketball             SATs   ...