Monday, August 2, 2010

Sit on It

You know how the Princess slept restlessly all night on her pile of mattresses above the wee little pea? I have my own way of discerning whether or not something is a wise decision in my life.

I sit on it.

I don’t get to find out whether I’m a princess or not, but I do get to celebrate that I’ve made a good choice.

My husband and I call it the three day rule.

We’ve implemented it numerous times and each time we’ve been grateful. When there’s a big (key word here) decision looming over us, we sit on it. We wait three days. We pray. We turn the thing around so many times it resembles an out of whack Rubik’s Cube. We hope for clarity.
So glad we had this rule when we attended a time share meeting and the sellers nudged us to sign on the dotted line within minutes of hearing the presentation. Thank you three day rule. No thank you, time share.

We own some beautiful pieces of furniture because of the three day rule and we also own some fine looking shabby chic pieces I refurbished after I found them. Priceless.

Now, here’s something you need to understand, I’m an insanely passionate soul. This means I throw my whole self into something when it wins me over. This can present a problem when it comes to following the three day rule. In order to simmer any tendencies I have to act a wee little impulsive I respect the three day rule.

One time I remember throwing our rule to the wayside was the day we bought our dog. Had we thought about buying a dog? Absolutely. Did we know 100% the day we arrived to check out the Samoyed pups that one of them would be ours? Not so much. After all, we were “just looking.” But we brought one home and I’ve never regretted that decision.

Time is good. It allows the fanning fires of passion to calm some. It helps me to know whether I’m thinking clearly. There’s a time for fervent action. And there’s a time for contemplation, prayer and weighing.

When it comes to making decisions are you apt to act fast or sit on it?
*photos by flickr


  1. Oh, WENDY!!! I burn with passion and excitement and have learned the hard way to let the Holy Spirit's and my husband's reason temper things. I LOVE your three-day rule and recently implemented a slow down and pray technique on a big decision.

    It felt...RIGHT!!!

    Still battling the urge to dive in headfirst!


  2. Fabulous very little pea! Love defies a three day rule. I sit on my decisions, but not for a long time. With so much time in solitude, I like to talk these decisions over and consider their feedback. It also gives me time to pray wait for an answer.

  3. Well, when I look back I wonder. When we got a dog last Dec and took it back two days later, I wish I had your rule. When we packed everything and moved to Florida, we waited a whole year to decide! But we bought a timeshare and have never regretted it:)) So it all depends...

  4. YOU are a lady after my heart and soul. I too am too often led by desire and fireworks of the urge variety. As we age, we're learning to wait more, pray more, and panic less. If God wants it for us, it will still be there in a few days. If not, oh well.

    I heard a preacher say, "It's better to be too slow to act than too fast. You can always play catch up, but it's harder to play clean up."

  5. Great post Wendy! I'm probably more impulsive, but I praise God for my husband who challenges me to "sit on it". What a beautiful reminder for me this morning.

  6. I am an insanely passionate soul too and it at times gets me in deep...I love your three day rule! I think I am going to implement this in my life! Love you friend!

  7. The three day rule sounds awesome! Our world is so fast paced and move, Move, MOVE! that I think it's very wise to take some time out and really think and pray about things--especially big decisions.

    I tend to sit on things more often then not--unless we're in a book store and then all bets are off. Although I'm working to reform that. ;-)

  8. I tend to act fast and it's one thing I'm working on lately. Your three day rule sounds great.

  9. Very smart rule. Very smart girl. Your time share story got me. I drug my dear husband to one on vacation last summer, got put in the same vise grip, wasted three precious hours away from the boys, started a headache, and was nearly banging my head on the wall by the time they allowed us to escape.

    No, sometimes it doesn't take three days...

  10. I wish my husband used the 3 day rule. He is such an impulse buyer. I could sit on it for days.... :O)

  11. I'm taking this sound advice to hubby tonight~ the three day rule sounds priceless. I'm the right now kind of woman that knows what I want when I want it. That doesn't always pan out to be the best scenario, of course.

    Thank God for a husband who steers more towards the rational thinker and prayer.

  12. I do both. This weekend we bought a piece of furniture because it was at a store close-out, bought it right then and there.

    But we'd been looking and discussing for weeks, and already knew this was a good piece at a GREAT price.

    My wife and I go window shopping and practice leaving a store -- e.g. Lowe's or the mall -- without buying a thing.

    That sort of walkaway attitude helps control our impulsive nature and gives us confidence that we're making the right choice. Then, when we make the choice, we do it with utter confidence that we at least considered the choice to within reasonable means.

    We don't have a formal 3-day rule, but we certainly have a wait-and-see rule to stave off overly emotional purchases and life decisions.

    - Eric

  13. Oh, man, we are sisters of the soul!

    I WANT to act impulsively, but I married a cautious, thoughtful man who has taught me the value of careful consideration before jumping into things.

    Hopefully we balance one another out a little, as he is apt to consider things for so long the opportunity passes us by. :)

  14. I LOVE this rule. We usually TRY to do something like this, but hubby and I are both SO impulsive. We have the same dog story as you. We bought Bubba out of the blue. Didn't have a single dog item in our house when we brought him bowl, no leash. Nada. But we haven't regretted that decision either. This is a lovely post, Wendy-girl.

  15. Oh Wendy, I have learned the hard way that if I don't consult the Lord even in the smallest matters I will regret it. (I can hear Ali's voice from the Bachelorette shouting 'you'll regret this!' I guess if you don't watch you won't get that but I digress). I have HEAVILY regretted some decisions due to my lack of council. Thanks for this reminder on patience and not rushing into things.

  16. I am such a passionate soul! I'm one to just dive into things. I hear something, get an inkling of an idea and off I run! Thankfully,
    I have my husband (and the Holy Spirit) to keep me balanced. I'm better about it now (not much, but better) and I do try to "sit on it".

    Thanks for the kind words on my blog. And thanks for sticking around :)


  17. This is great advice. My husband and I are much like this, only making spur of the moment decisions occasionally. I do get reckless when it comes to smoothies or frapuccinos though - green tea or strawberry? You just never know what I'll choose:)

  18. Good rule! Big things-take time. When they didn't, we usually regretted it.

  19. I don't have a three-day rule like you do, but usually I think about it at least one day.

  20. Patti, I need to meet you.

    Kathy, Ah, prayer. Then the waiting. Oh, the waiting.

    Terri, I think we flipflopped on the whole spontaneity deal. Dog. Time share. Nice.

    Jeanette, Wise quote. You are another soul I'd love to meet. I'm an explosion of impulsivity. Slow is good. My husband is much more cautious.

    Ryan & Melanie, My man is the one who slows me down. Mile a minute otherwise.

    Chrystie, Let me know if you implement it and how it goes for you. Love you, too!

    Danyelle, Bookstores are downright dangerous places for me.

    Cindy, It's becoming a learned thing. Sometimes fast action equals great blessings. God can talk quickly if need be. ;)

    Rhonda, Hey you were at the same meeting we went to. ;) But we were there ten years ago.

    Diane, Oh, when it comes to spending, my husband and I are freakishly frugal. I'm open to that changing any day now.

    Tamika, I'm like you. Look out when I go shopping. Dart toward the item. Purchase it and am at my car in a matter of 7.3 minutes.

    Eric, Well, a deal's a deal and sometimes you need to jump on those. Sounds like you and your wife are in sync. Very cool.

    Erica, Yes, that we are. I can't wait to laugh w/ you at ACFW.

    Katie, Is it wrong that I want you to bring Bubba in Sept? I start learning about dogs and I get a little attached. ;)

    T.Anne, Sadly (oh so sadly) I watch. And I know that which you speak of. (On in 20 min. here.) You, my friend make me laugh!

    Jen, It's wild b/c I'm learning a lot of my blog readers are like me, passionate souls who eat life. Loving that.

    Karen, The exception is with any caffeinated product. All caution flies out the window then.

    Karen, (You two really need to stop following each other.) Yeah, and what fun is regret?

    Recovering L., I like to think. No need to resist it. Fun to invite it.


    You'll never hear me say otherwise.

    My girls have been asking to borrow my pillows to help them fall asleep. It's things like that that make motherhood such a wonder and treasure.

    Praise God.

    For time.

    All the time.
    ~ Wendy

  21. Time is good. Waiting before making decisions is important. I don't always do it and I think I pretty much regret it everytime when I jump into something without thinking first.
    W.I.P. It: A Writer's Journey

  22. I've done both. This sounds really ambivalent. But it depends on how certain I am. Most of the time, waiting is the best method. But when I KNOW that I am experiencing spiritual conviction, it's best to act on it immediately.

  23. After we ended up with a bad, but terribly cheap car, we implemented the 24 hour rule. However, bumping it up to three days wouldn't be a bad idea!

  24. Oh, I definitely, at the very least, give big decisions the "sleep on it" test. If bigger, then we try to give it time b/f deciding. The challenge? Teaching this to the kids.

  25. Great post, Wendy. Yes, I sit on the big decisions. But the little ones? I try to make them as quickly as possible and move on with my life. I hear you on the time share, sister!

  26. Wendy:
    I prefer to plan for things. Hubby can be impulsive when it's something HE wants. Several years ago(2002), he kept saying we needed another car in addition to the one we had. He was right, but I didn't want to get into that hassle. One morning, I turned the day over to God and we bought a second car. It was important to me to wait a while. We don't purchase cars unless we need to. BTW, we still have that car. (2010)

  27. Ooo. I like this. My husband thinks I need it. It's just that I sometimes examine things long and carefully and quietly. When I'm finally ready to move he thinks I'm impulsive, and that's the point that we wait some more so he can do the same.

    Funny thing is, the stuff that really is impulsive? He usually agrees with me immediately, LOL!

  28. Oh yes. I have the Simon Peter temperament, to be sure. The three day rule is great! I think it really helped that I had three days between the receipt of my editorial letter and my call with my editors. Coincidence? I think not. ;-)

  29. I've been known to act fast and then regret it immensely. I'm usually happier with my decision when I've allowed myself more time to think. I will definitely start implementing your three day rule. :)

  30. Oh, Beautiful Wendy! Thanks so much for your comment and for thinking of me. Sending sweet blessings your way! Hugs, Amy

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