I’m thinking of prom. Not my prom, though I must say whatever memories I have are sweet and special. The guy I went with became a pastor and is doing wonderful things at his church. This doesn’t surprise me. He always had a kind heart; he was prepared and eager to follow God’s lead.
I’m thinking of prom because I’ve been talking to the group of teenage girls I lead who are getting ready to go. Flashes from Pretty in Pink come to mind. The dress hunting, the high school DRAMA…so much of it, especially on the night of, and most of it fabricated and drawn out to make the night more “interesting” I suppose.
I’ve heard Beyonce’s song, Halo on the radio and have wondered how many proms will have that as the theme song. It’s a pretty song really, the melody, the pounding beat…but the lyrics…oh those lyrics. They make me nervous.
“Standing in the light of your Halo
I've got my angel now…
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away…”
(It will fade away by the way…).
I had all kinds of relationships before I met my husband. I was primed to pour my heart into any guy that made me feel special and that’s why these lyrics make me nervous. A boy, a guy, a man or any qualifier of the opposite sex cannot save us (nor can we save them).
In fact, I’ll go so far as to say that guy you’re dancing with, he’s just as screwed up as you are. He can’t get you out of your feelings, can’t make your life less complicated for you, or can’t carry you away on a white stallion (he can barely afford the car payments to his folks). Men weren’t made to save women. Women weren’t made to save men. We have but one Savior.
I’m a sucker for romance and I’m inclined to tell myself to chill out. The lyrics, the song – it’s pretty…it’s no big deal. Yet, anyone who has placed someone else (or has been placed) on that pedestal, as that filler, as that person to take them away from it all, the one to heal or to save, well, they know. They may not know now, but someday they will. It’s a dangerous and unfair place to put someone. They’ll fail. They weren’t made for it and worse, you’ll feel you’ve been deceived in your romantic fantasy, from your dream and your hope of relationship when really it was never supposed to be like that.
You can’t put a halo on the head of someone it doesn’t fit.
Ask my husband, I crave intimacy, physical closeness and deep connection and I can be just as sappy as the rest of them in my cravings. I know though, only God is able to meet certain needs. My husband can be a glimpse and a reflection of relationship with God, but even in all the ways he loves me, sacrificially and intimately…it will never come close to the way God loves me, to what he sacrificed for me.
I have two visions of God’s halo.
His halo was the crown of thorns pressed into his skull as a mockery.
His halo lights up the world.
And that…that makes me dance.